If happiness was gold,
you'd be making me rich.
If I could carry every burden you had,
I would march to Mordor and drop them into the volcano.
Im mele'eth le.
If you read this,
would you kiss me?
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
Idiom
"How could you?" used to be nothing more to me
than an accusatory idiom.
Now I'm just honestly curious.
than an accusatory idiom.
Now I'm just honestly curious.
Friday, August 12, 2011
You.
You
are my mentor,
my dungeon master,
my best friend,
and the one I want to share all of me with.
I
would lay down my life for you,
dream about kissing you all day long,
want to spend the rest of my life with you,
want to be holding your hand when the world ends,
think the habitants of my fish tank are cooler than a t-rex
just because we picked them out together
and you said I could have pet rats in our future house
even though you hate them,
and 74% of the time I'd probably even share my last cookie with you.
are my mentor,
my dungeon master,
my best friend,
and the one I want to share all of me with.
I
would lay down my life for you,
dream about kissing you all day long,
want to spend the rest of my life with you,
want to be holding your hand when the world ends,
think the habitants of my fish tank are cooler than a t-rex
just because we picked them out together
and you said I could have pet rats in our future house
even though you hate them,
and 74% of the time I'd probably even share my last cookie with you.
Friday, July 1, 2011
Too Sharp
If the Pen is mightier than the sword,
than surely the tongue is sharper than a small dagger.
Lately there have been so many excess words inside me,
(and I've always been bad at juggling)
that I end up dropping these daggers and hitting people I love
in non-vital, but
the most painful of places.
than surely the tongue is sharper than a small dagger.
Lately there have been so many excess words inside me,
(and I've always been bad at juggling)
that I end up dropping these daggers and hitting people I love
in non-vital, but
the most painful of places.
Thursday, June 30, 2011
Nostalgia
So, I just moved apartments, and in the process inevitably got distracted by all the random crapola I have around. However, I found this essay that I wrote my sophomore year in high school (four years ago) and thought it was worth sharing. Enjoy!
How to Spot a Musical Freak
They walk the hallways just like normal high school students. They are everywhere. They could be in the locker next to yours, sitting at your lunch table, even in your science class. Slowly, the students of West Albany High School are being converted into musical freaks! Luckily, there are ways to tell who the musical freaks are and who are the normal students. Read on to discover how to diagnose a victim of this terrible obsession.
If you suspect that your friend may be a musical freak, the first step would be to check their iPod. A normal high school student would have things like Fall Out Boy, Gretchen Wilson, or the infamous Queen, but look further. If you see things like Wicked, Rent, or South Pacific, there is a pretty good chance that your friend is experimenting in the musical freak territory.
The next step is to look at their schedule. Classes like choir, band, and drama are definite giveaways. Also watch which teachers they talk to in the hallways. If your friend is participating in the musical freakery, they are most likely very familiar with the infamous trio that leads the insanity: Cate Cafferella, Stuart Welch, and Cameron McFee.
If no signs are found in the iPod or schedule, you can also check for physical signs. The most obvious is the eyes. Look under the bottom eyelashes. Musical freaks are always staying up late learning lines and practicing music, or out late at rehearsals, so chances are you will find heavy bags under the eyes. Also check the feet. A musical freak will never have pretty feet. Look for blisters, bunions, and, if you're really brave, massage the feet. If the person exclaims, "Don't stop! My feet are killing me!", this person has most likely been spending a good amount of time practicing dance steps. Also, be on the lookout for sudden changes in appearance that may be required by a musical. A random shaved head, a sudden break out from night after night of heavy makeup, unannounced shaving of sideburns that he was very fond of, or an unbecoming new hair color after she claimed she would never dye it. Musical freaks are known to make drastic appearance sacrifices for their shows.
Eben more prominent than the physical signs are the behavior signs. Follow the suspected musical freak very closely in the hallway and listen. If you hear them humming "I Can Hear the Bells" or muttering a conversation between multiple personalities, they've probably overdosed on a certain musical obsession and now have it engrained into their brain. This phenomenon is known to some as having it "stuck in their head."
Also watch their reactions. Tell them some extremely insignificant "bad news" and see how they respond. Perhaps tell them that you ran out of brownie mix. A normal person would say something along the lines of, "Oh, sad", while a musical freak will shout in an especially dramatic manner, "Oh no! How can I possibly go on without brownies!" and possibly collapse to the floor in agony. Also, count how many times a day the person hugs you. If this number exceeds four, I can personally guarantee that you are in the presence of a very extreme musical freak.
Dealing with a friend-turned-musical-freak can be too much for a teenager to deal with. The MFHL (musical freak help line) always has professionals standing by. If you or someone you love is being converted into a musical freak, don't hesitate to call 1-800-MY-FRIENDS-A-MUSICAL-FREAK-AND-NOW-IM-CALLING-THIS-EXTREMELY-LONG-NUMBER-FOR-HELP.
You too can join the resistance to end this unnatural obsession with cheesy musicals. We can stop this spread of hysteria before it becomes a national pandemic. Don't hesitate or make fun; this is serious business. Unless you want to live your tomorrows randomly bursting into "Can't Help Lovin' 'Dat Man", we need to take every precaution available. Fight back or you too could be turned into a full-on musical freak. God bless you all.
How to Spot a Musical Freak
They walk the hallways just like normal high school students. They are everywhere. They could be in the locker next to yours, sitting at your lunch table, even in your science class. Slowly, the students of West Albany High School are being converted into musical freaks! Luckily, there are ways to tell who the musical freaks are and who are the normal students. Read on to discover how to diagnose a victim of this terrible obsession.
If you suspect that your friend may be a musical freak, the first step would be to check their iPod. A normal high school student would have things like Fall Out Boy, Gretchen Wilson, or the infamous Queen, but look further. If you see things like Wicked, Rent, or South Pacific, there is a pretty good chance that your friend is experimenting in the musical freak territory.
The next step is to look at their schedule. Classes like choir, band, and drama are definite giveaways. Also watch which teachers they talk to in the hallways. If your friend is participating in the musical freakery, they are most likely very familiar with the infamous trio that leads the insanity: Cate Cafferella, Stuart Welch, and Cameron McFee.
If no signs are found in the iPod or schedule, you can also check for physical signs. The most obvious is the eyes. Look under the bottom eyelashes. Musical freaks are always staying up late learning lines and practicing music, or out late at rehearsals, so chances are you will find heavy bags under the eyes. Also check the feet. A musical freak will never have pretty feet. Look for blisters, bunions, and, if you're really brave, massage the feet. If the person exclaims, "Don't stop! My feet are killing me!", this person has most likely been spending a good amount of time practicing dance steps. Also, be on the lookout for sudden changes in appearance that may be required by a musical. A random shaved head, a sudden break out from night after night of heavy makeup, unannounced shaving of sideburns that he was very fond of, or an unbecoming new hair color after she claimed she would never dye it. Musical freaks are known to make drastic appearance sacrifices for their shows.
Eben more prominent than the physical signs are the behavior signs. Follow the suspected musical freak very closely in the hallway and listen. If you hear them humming "I Can Hear the Bells" or muttering a conversation between multiple personalities, they've probably overdosed on a certain musical obsession and now have it engrained into their brain. This phenomenon is known to some as having it "stuck in their head."
Also watch their reactions. Tell them some extremely insignificant "bad news" and see how they respond. Perhaps tell them that you ran out of brownie mix. A normal person would say something along the lines of, "Oh, sad", while a musical freak will shout in an especially dramatic manner, "Oh no! How can I possibly go on without brownies!" and possibly collapse to the floor in agony. Also, count how many times a day the person hugs you. If this number exceeds four, I can personally guarantee that you are in the presence of a very extreme musical freak.
Dealing with a friend-turned-musical-freak can be too much for a teenager to deal with. The MFHL (musical freak help line) always has professionals standing by. If you or someone you love is being converted into a musical freak, don't hesitate to call 1-800-MY-FRIENDS-A-MUSICAL-FREAK-AND-NOW-IM-CALLING-THIS-EXTREMELY-LONG-NUMBER-FOR-HELP.
You too can join the resistance to end this unnatural obsession with cheesy musicals. We can stop this spread of hysteria before it becomes a national pandemic. Don't hesitate or make fun; this is serious business. Unless you want to live your tomorrows randomly bursting into "Can't Help Lovin' 'Dat Man", we need to take every precaution available. Fight back or you too could be turned into a full-on musical freak. God bless you all.
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
People
We are
from the transient at the market on Saturday with the patched pants and the adorable puppy who showd me a necklace, telling me it was made from traveler's stones and buffalo horn, which I purchased, even though it was obviously plastic, (Hey, it has value in the Labrynth!)
to the seventeen-year-old boy at the rock concert last night that was trying to grind my leg like a Schnauzer,
to the semi-professional baseball player singing his heart out to Taylor Swift in the hotel lobby this morning,
to the foul-smelling woman sitting behind me at my little sister's graduation talking loudly in her seventy-five-year-old chain-smoker voice to everyone around her through the whole thing and blaring her airhorn in my ear when her granddaughter's name was called,
what make up our race,
and what make the world.
from the transient at the market on Saturday with the patched pants and the adorable puppy who showd me a necklace, telling me it was made from traveler's stones and buffalo horn, which I purchased, even though it was obviously plastic, (Hey, it has value in the Labrynth!)
to the seventeen-year-old boy at the rock concert last night that was trying to grind my leg like a Schnauzer,
to the semi-professional baseball player singing his heart out to Taylor Swift in the hotel lobby this morning,
to the foul-smelling woman sitting behind me at my little sister's graduation talking loudly in her seventy-five-year-old chain-smoker voice to everyone around her through the whole thing and blaring her airhorn in my ear when her granddaughter's name was called,
what make up our race,
and what make the world.
Monday, June 6, 2011
I Am...
Precisely Punctual
Poignantly Practical
Properly Pretty
Pungently Peculiar
Painfully Possessive
Playfully Pleasant
Precariously Ponderous
Pensively Pushy
Perpetually Productive
Poetically Paranoid
Potently Pedestrian
Placidly Positive
and predictably, PENIS!
Poignantly Practical
Properly Pretty
Pungently Peculiar
Painfully Possessive
Playfully Pleasant
Precariously Ponderous
Pensively Pushy
Perpetually Productive
Poetically Paranoid
Potently Pedestrian
Placidly Positive
and predictably, PENIS!
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